In order to drum up interest in fussybear Baker booked me to speak at a round table discussion in Williamsburg, titled: So Yesterday: Bloggers and Twitterati discuss blogging and twittering for the NOW generation both today and tomorrow.
Williamsburg, as many of you already know, is a ridiculous, prefabricated mall-like “neighborhood” conceived and built in the mid-1990’s by developers hoping to lure in the coveted creative over-class demographic. It’s worked – so far as anything as disgusting and obscene as that can work – and Williamsburg has become THE neighborhood for the wealthy, college educated scions of child porn, puppy mill and hedge fund magnates.
The auditorium was accessible only through an unmarked sewer grate which I was required to fart on to gain access. Inside the auditorium was about three fourths full. I didn’t know anyone else on the panel. They all look younger, wore plaid and seemed to know each other.
I stumbled through a couple of questions, blushing heavily. Midway through I awkwardly got up and left the stage.
Baker and Bonnie, who had escorted me to the event, and were sitting in the back of the auditorium sipping wine through straws, just shook their heads.
I stumbled around for a bit looking for a bathroom. Finally I found the event organizer, some kid named Terin, and asked him where it was. He looked at me blankly, then said “bathroom?” Then he laughed.
